Just checking in

263 this morning.  17 down now.

Muscles sore again today -- a bit tired all over.

Can't get no....satisfaction!

Juicing doesn't satisfy ANY mental or emotional dimension of hunger.  The only thing it does satisfy is the actual hunger pangs themselves.  On any other diet that I've been on, I have attempted to satisfy the cravings for one food with another food -- you want mashed potatoes thick with butter and gravy; you eat a steamed sweet potato instead.  You want ice cream; you eat a bowl of frozen berries instead.  The extent to which the healthy food satisfies the yearning for the craved food is the extent to which you feel satisfied after eating... and frankly, the success of the diet depends on this.  You go weeks and weeks without satisfying the cravings for certain foods, but the cravings are still there, and willpower wears thin.

This is totally different.  No matter how strong my desire for any food is, the ONLY thing I can do is simply deny it.  There is no substitution, no partial satisfaction.

Some juice recipes, mostly good

I've discovered a juice that I really enjoy drinking first thing in the morning.  It's 2 apples, half a lemon, and a very large handful of spinach.  It can be made the night before and stored in the fridge; I've had it the past 2 mornings and it just hits the spot.

Made a juice entirely of watermelon last night; it was good at first but didn't keep well, after an hour or so it seemed to... sour.  Also made a juice of 3 carrots and 2 oranges; I really loved that one, and so did Todd, which says something.

That was bizarre...

Feeling badly most of the day.  Hungry in the morning, and irritable.  Just...off.   Can't really put a finger on what exactly was off, though.  Muscles achy, and tired.  Emotionally, too.  Just want the day to end so I can sleep.  Haven't felt that way since, well, since this fast started.  Cold, and shaky.  Todd came home for a couple of hours this afternoon and asked me what I wanted most for him to do.  I said, "Watch the girls so I can take a nap."  Crawled into bed and shivered.  I think I finally slept, but it was a very, very light sleep, because I never lost that alert feeling.  When I tried to get up after an hour, it was like lifting a ton of bricks.  Moan.  Still shaky, still cold... Went downstairs and started making some juice.  Not hungry at all. 

Now, later in the evening, the symptoms have mostly worn off, but I have that quiet feeling your body gets after an illness.  Was that just a detox episode, or what?

Day 7

Hungry most of the day yesterday.  Went shopping -- my first attempt to buy enough fruits and veggies for one week!  The only thing that is really obscene is the number of apples I go through.  At the check-out counter, the couple behind me asked if I was buying for an organization.  "Nope,"  I said.  "Just myself."  I have to say, I did NOT enjoy shopping on an empty stomach.  I felt like a priest in a whorehouse.  And it didn't help that I had accidently left my thermos of juice in the car. 

Monday is going to be Scale Day for me.  271 pounds this morning.  9 down -- a whole hell of a lot still to go.  Even though I have lost more than a pound a day, I have to say I am a little disappointed.  I think I was expecting to lose more in the first week.  Ah well, weight loss is weight loss, and whether I lose 50 pounds on this fast or 100, I will still have a new body in June.

"Moar"

I want to write more, I really do.  But I get precious few moments during the day when I can actually sit down at the computer without tandem whining interupting my train of thought.

Tonight's green juice doesn't have any carrots -- not my favorite, but for variety's sake I need to mix it up.  So, 3 apples 1/2 a lime, a whole bunch of spinach, a very large chunk of red cabbage, about 1/2 a head of celery, 1 cucumber, 1 tomato, and a quarter of a red pepper.

I'm feeling great.  It's actually a bit disturbing how good I feel.  I think I expected more hunger, and I know I expected more of a... painful... cleansing process.  Like more headaches and headcolds, weakness, irritability, etc.  But then again, all that may be coming down the pike.

Tonight Todd made dinner for the girls while I ran to the store for more apples.  Yay!  Cooking is hard for me -- all those lovely smells, and a powerful urge to taste what I'm making.

A better juicing schedule

So I figured something out.  That last juicing session of the day was really hard to fit in.  From the time I start making dinner for the girls (around 4:30pm) until Carly is tucked in at 7 or 7:15, I'm pretty much non-stop working:  cooking, feeding, washing up, straightening up the toys, putting girls into pajamas, etc.  And after I've gotten both girls into bed and actually have 45 minutes of "me time" before work, the last thing I want to do is go back DOWN to the kitchen and spend that time juicing and cleaning up after myself.  So today I made my last two juices at 3pm.  It means that last fruit juice won't be fresh, but if that's the price I have to pay for sanity, I'll pay it.